5 Songs That Are Stuck In My… Heart

Here are five songs that will forever be associated with specific things, people, events, or eras of my life. I thought it might be fun to list them here and encourage my followers to do the same. Which songs are stuck in your heart (and/or your head)?

1. Fast Car by Tracy Chapman

For me, this song represents my mom. When I was little, she would play Tracy Chapman’s album over and over again, and this was her favorite song on the whole record. I knew all the words to it by the time I was six and we would both sing along. It was the first song that ever filled me with a sense of sadness or emotion— and it means so much to me now not only because it is a beautiful combination of tragedy and hopefulness, but because it pulls me right back into the arms of my mom when I was a little girl. I think this song showed me what music can do to a person’s heart.

And I had a feeling that I belonged. I had a feeling I could be someone.

2. The Heart Of Life by John Mayer 

In September of 2008, I lost two people very dear to me within the span of 36 hours. The numbness was overwhelming— I was obviously extremely sad, but I just couldn’t seem to get the emotions out. Maybe it was shock, maybe it was confusion, or maybe it was a conscious effort on my part to keep things inside. This song had always been one of my favorites from John Mayer, but it suddenly took on a new meaning. A few days before the funeral, I walked into my bedroom and sat down on the cold hardwood floor. With this song playing in the background, I was finally able to cry. And it was a cry that I so desperately needed. This song always gives me hope.

You know it’s nothing new. Bad news never had good timing. But then, the circle of your friends will defend the silver lining.

3. Snow by Red Hot Chili Peppers

This was the first song that my brother and I ever bonded over. I feel like it symbolizes my transition from “little sister” to “friend” with him. We first listened to it shortly after Ben got his license and my parents allowed him to take me on a drive in his crappy old car. He popped the tape converter into the tape deck, turned on this song, and told me that it was by one of his favorite bands. I distinctly remember feeling… cooler, more relevant, and less like a silly little pest. And it doesn’t hurt that the song is great, of course.

The more I see, the less I know, the more I’d like to let it go.

4. Lullaby by The Cat Empire

I don’t want to go into depth with this one because it hurts. A lot. But this song meant a whole lot to me and someone who I cared about (and, despite my best efforts, still care about) more than I can possibly express. I first heard it in the fall of 2008 as I sat with my laptop in a cool, darkened basement. It was there from the beginning and it used to make me happier than anything in the world. I haven’t brought myself to listen to it in months.

‘Cause what happens when I’m with you makes me shake my head and smile and yawn. I’m worn out but I’m beaming, and it seems that we are dreamy as we head out through that strange old morning door.

5. Wake Up by Arcade Fire

This song is like a healer to me. I’ve been dealing with some not-so-fun things lately, and when I get really overwhelmed, depressed, angry, or hurt, I have a habit of running out to my car, blasting this song, and driving until all the tears have run themselves dry. It’s simultaneously uplifting, angry, and sad… but the words hit me in a way that nothing else does. It reassures me that my struggles are universal struggles. That life is not perfect and never will be. That it’s up to me to “wake up.”

We’re just a million little gods causing rain storms, turing every good thing to rust. I’ll guess we’ll just have to adjust.